I’ve rewritten this post too many times to count. It’s a tricky topic – and a subject that I think so many of us struggle with on a daily basis. There’s this idea in our society that if we, as parents, just try hard enough, or read enough articles, or poll all the moms we know, that we’ll figure it out – how to do it all, how to keep all the plates balanced in the air (with a pretty cupcake on top). This idea is based on some common misunderstanding that what we’re already doing isn’t enough. We observe others that we deem “similar” to ourselves and collect a database of all the things that we think we should be doing. We see the mom at school who not only is the PTA president, but also volunteers countless hours in her child’s classroom and serves at the food bank every Wednesday. We see the mom as we drive by the park who sits happily watching her children play while handing out carrot sticks and whole-grain, freshly baked muffins. We see the mom at the gym or the mom in a snazzy business suit, and it goes on and on. We take from what we observe and desire about each of them and add it to the list. And then we look at this extensive, impossible, comprehensive list and decide that we’re not doing enough. It’s time that we let go of this impossible quest and learn to be truly happy with ourselves, be satisfied that we’re doing enough. For me, this will always be a struggle, but if I keep a check on my priorities and stay focused on what’s important to me, to my family, I can go to bed at the end of the day feeling like it was enough. I read something once about friendships. The gist of the article was that our friends each play different roles in our lives. One friend might make us laugh, another lends advice, and another reminds us how to play. Can we view our roles in our families the same way? Instead of comparing ourselves to each other, let’s accept that we each play an important, different role in life. Take care of yourself in the way that you need it. Take care of your family in the way that you feel comfortable. Work to make sure that the basics are taken care of – nourishment, shelter, nurturing. Figure out how to meet the basics of day-to-day life – driving the kids to school, paying bills, getting groceries. Tell your family how much you love them every single day. And focus on who you are and what your role is and just do your best. Adapt as life changes, because it always changes. The truth is, there’s not one answer to making it all work because it’s not a one size fits all quest. Do what works for you and your lifestyle, and know that you’re doing just fine.
What do you to keep yourself from being overwhelmed by the challenges of everyday life? Share with me in the comments below for a chance to win a set of Bridgestone tires!
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Comments & Reviews
Cindy says
Awe…Loved this post! I am sitting now almost laughing as my post today on the blog was “Is being a Mom an art” in my Wednesday in the Word. I think a lot of women are on the same page these day! Thanks for sharing. Hugs and blessings, Cindy
Jeanette says
I make lists of things I must get done…helps be stay focused and less anxious that I will forget something. And I have a tendency to remember that these “things” don’t really count in the long run. Every day I have the love of my husband and children and that doesn’t depend on my performance or what I did or did not get done.
Jess M says
Oh so true!! I am that mom that is up at school all the time, volunteering too many hours but my house is a disaster. It is important to me and my kids that I can be at school for the events and just the day to day stuff, the dust and dishes can wait!! I have learned that I will never be like the other mom’s and I am ok with that, to each their own 🙂
Dena says
Great post……can totally relate.
Annie says
I take a deep breath and hug my child, and spend some time doing something my kid wants to do…reading a book, color together, or play dolls together. Those moments count more for both my child and myself, and chores can wait!
Erika says
I try to have dinner ready before we call the kids to the table, and get the bath ready before I tell them it’s time for one- doing things ahead of time helps our family a lot!
chambanachik(at)gmail(dot)com
Natalie says
I try to prepare as much as I can over the weekend by making my lunches ahead of time and cooking some dinners to freeze. I also lay out my clothes for the next day.
Natalie says
I tweeted about this giveaway and my twitter id is @yarbr012: https://twitter.com/yarbr012/status/484429079441981440
Charity says
I struggle with this EVERY day. I have to remind myself that I don’t have to do everything. Even just keeping kids clean, clothed, and fed can be difficult though.
Stacey Dalton says
Keeping things balanced… Hmmm… More like an ebb and flow with me. Some days I feel inspired to do so many things and some days i am not so inspired. But it works for my kids and my family. I just have to pick and choose my “fun” activities and when we need down time.
heather says
I make a lot of lists of the things that I need to get done during the day so I keep organized and not overwhelmed.
kelly croft says
Everyday I spend quality timme with both girls. No matter what end up getting done, at least I have that.
courtney b says
i try to create a schedule for myself and stick to it. i dont get side tracked and try no to let things slow me down like other stresses in my life.
courtney b says
tweet
https://twitter.com/MeandBells/status/484744714139475968
Wanda McHenry says
I keep from being overwhelmed by not having a care in the world. I don’t work and retired early and my day is care-free, simple and our lives are happy.
Wanda McHenry says
https://twitter.com/myfolly/status/484980482166116352
Alisha Huber says
i take advantage of any downtime to try to get more organized in my life. Every bit of organization makes everything else easier. And every minute I’m not spending looking for that important form or whatever is a minute I get to spend with my children.
Susan Smith says
I make a lot of lists of the things that I need to get done during the day so I keep organized and ask for help from my family if I need it.
Susan Smith says
https://twitter.com/susan1215/status/485149671925354498
Jessie C. says
I stay organized by the help with my checklist. I make a list and follow it as much as I can, however not sweat over skipping some. It happens from time to time in life.
Jessie C. says
-https://twitter.com/tcarolinep/status/485249873428897792
Tiffany says
I try to keep a schedule. When that invariably changes, I just remind myself that my husband and daughter are happy and loved. The chores will never be done, but these precious young years will be over too soon.
Emily says
I really have to prioritize and let go of my perfectionist tendencies.
D Schmidt says
We plan ahead a lot and try to prepare for everything (as best we can) For example, I take a spare change of clothes for my children for the beach, lots of snacks and an emergency first aid kit.
D Schmidt says
Tweeted
https://twitter.com/mummytotwoboys1/status/485909488847691777
Sonja says
Some days I do get overwhelmed. I have a great helpful husband who often comes home to pick up the pieces . Other ways I survive and stay calm is to have a white board with the weeks schedule posted. I try to post the meal for that day (or at the very least take something out of the freezer that morning!). I also post the meetings/appointments for that week and a couple of “to do’s” that I try to accomplish during the week. If it doesn’t get done by Friday I usually erase it if its not important, or add it to next Monday. I like knowing I can erase something on my to do if its not really important…because if it was important I would have got it done! I like to have a cleaning schedule, that I’m kind of ignoring right now because we have relocated temporarily during our house reno, which involves one chore and a load of laundry each day. I try to involve the kids because then they aren’t making a mess right behind me. Extra chores I try to do in the evenings before I collapse on the couch or bed. Planned family fun events on the weekend gets them energized for the next week. Overwhelmed, one step at a time right? Or one moment at a time, and I try not to think too far in advance.
mysweetiepiepie says
I try to limit myself to things I know I can actually get done, although sometimes I do get carried away.
Heidi G says
I try to take a step back to see that my kids are healthy and happy and learning, and remember that it’s the small stuff that counts – listening to them, giving them my time, offering lots of hugs and smiles. I make time for myself to decompress by knitting/sewing or meeting with friends or taking a delicious nap. Oh… I have also avoided joining Pinterest, as tempting as it is. 😉
Amy S says
I like to make to-do lists, and spread tasks out to make things manageable!
courtney b says
i take lots of medicine! lol i know that sounds horrible but sometimes you need it when you have a super stressful life…which I totally do working full time with lots of kids running around!
Linda says
I take advantage of organizational tools and like to make lists to help me plan out my day and tackle each thing in an organized, methodical manner so I am not as overwhelmed by the often, numerous tasks I need to do daily.
Linda says
Tweet – https://twitter.com/CbytheSea5/status/487276747566907392
Ellie W says
I keep a calendar/planner on my computer desk and use it to keep up with schedules, bills, and even prescription refills.
Ellie W says
tweet
https://twitter.com/eswright18/status/487374004592730115
Debbie B says
we just take each day one by one – no need in getting overwhelmed or under pressure
Debbie B says
i posted a tweet:
https://twitter.com/bellows22/status/488101873467924481
Tina M says
i take a hot bath and drink my wine.
Tina M says
https://twitter.com/HappyTina0115/status/488155152449159169
Melissa M says
I keep a planner with me at all times to right down any appointments and things to do.
rachel says
I pray! Talking to God keeps me focused on what’s important.
Gina M says
I rely on my google calendar to keep myself organized.
Thanks for the chance to win!
wildorchid985 at gmail dot com
Gina M says
tweet–https://twitter.com/WildOrchid985/status/489949767951060994
shelly peterson says
I try and prepare as much as I can the night before so there is less to do in the mornings. this helps a lot.
cshell090869 at aol dot com
shelly peterson says
tweeted
https://twitter.com/cshell202/status/490007424275738624
cshell090869 at aol dot com
Colleen Cecil says
I read in a blog post at the beginning of the year to consider “embracing the chaos” as a resolution. And so I have. Yep it’s chaotic often but it’s my chaos.
Anna Pry says
It helps me to take a quiet moment with a cup of coffee pryfamily5@gmail.com
Anna Pry says
i tweeted https://twitter.com/thepryfamily5/status/490634753746280448 pryfamily5@gmail.com
Amy says
I go to spin class, it kicks my butt, but oh my goodness does it feel good after, it’s like a reset button… i ffeel like I can conquer the world after. =)
Erica Best says
i love a hot shower and good book before i go to school
Erica Best says
https://twitter.com/purplelover04/status/491362458712301568
Natalie J Vandenberghe says
I pray, then prioritize. I’m hoping to win these tires for my middle daughter, a disabled Vet, who is overwhelmed by her situation. She needs new tires, so she has reliable transportation to the VA Hospital–which is more than two hours away. Thanks for the giveaway.
That cupcake is beautiful 😉
Natalie J Vandenberghe says
Tweet! https://twitter.com/lexiquin/status/491713241555283968
Margot C says
What a cute post! I keep myself from getting overwhelmed by delegating to (yes!) my husband and (yes again) my stepson. It’s a drag that they have to be told, but I don’t nag and they do stuff bless their hearts.
Margot C says
I posted a tweet too: https://twitter.com/AnnaZed/status/492759351820435457
Leah S says
Just one day at a time, one foot in front of the other 🙂
sorahart says
Focusing on the good things we have going on in our family, instead of thinking of all the things we DON’T have, keeps me happy and keeps a positive atmosphere on our house. This is when things get done!
cindyzs says
What do you to keep yourself from being overwhelmed by the challenges of everyday life? the best and most simple answer……..I pray……couldnt live without it! (i entered on the site with the rules on it, left your blog name and the same answer, well the pray part, thanks so much) I will pray to win the tires….i need them severly…….i was supposed to go be with my mom, but do not have the $$ to make the multi state trip, my tires are baaaad!!! and i know i would die in a wreck or kill someone else………so i am on hold… thanks again 🙂
cindyzs says
ok did options 1 & 4! thanks
Alida Lee says
I’m struggling with this right now. One thing I do is go have a lunch or dinner with a friend. We’ll inevitably start talking about the challenges in our lives, and it makes me realize I’m not alone. Just knowing that my friends are in the same boat keeps me from feeling isolated!
Veronica says
I sew, read, watch tv, or when given the chance, go shopping by myself!
Sarah says
It is so easy for me to compare myself to other moms and then self criticize. I try to have quality time with my kids each day and remind myself that they are my most important job! If other things don’t get done, at least my most important job has gotten done!
Sandra says
It took me a while but I learned I can’t do it “all”, and that’s ok. There are times when the balance works more in my favor and those times are great, but during the times when things are really busy and we eat leftovers for dinner and the kids get pb&j for lunch, I’ve realized that’s ok too. Life is about balance, do more when you can and cut yourself some slack when you just aren’t able to get it all done!
Susan says
I drink wine.
And/or take deep breaths. Make lists. Whittle lists down to what is actually do-able after I’ve made totally unrealistic lists. Sleep, because when I haven’t slept enough I make terrible decisions.
Elizabeth says
I always think to myself “have I done what’s important today?” Evening if that is reading one book to one kid…it’s enough.
Steveandliz(at)gmail(dot)com
Simple Simon and Company says
I make lists….and drink waaaaaay too much caffeinated soda.-liZ
Shannon C. says
My days are extremely full with a new baby, a large family and just “life”. I HAVE TO get up at least an hour before everyone else in the house to pray and read my Bible. It centers me and helps me navigate the day for sure.
Shannon C. says
Twitter Link: https://twitter.com/LittleKidsGrow/status/493885563775496193
Ashley H says
I make lists at the beginning of the day so I don’t get so overwhelmed.
Sabra at Sew a Straight Line says
Ice cream. It keeps me sane 🙂 Really, though, I set aside treats for crazy days. And I usually eat them in the garage, hiding by myself. This is my life 😉
Betty C says
My mom told me once about her sister. She would stay at home and clean rather than going somewhere with her husband. Her husband passed away after only a few years of marriage and she always regretted not spending more time with him. My mom always said the housework can wait. Time with family is more important.
To make sure I do the things that need to be done I have to have lists. I’m so forgetful I have to have multiple sets of keys because I can never remember where I left the last one I used.
Dandi D says
I always get up early every morning so I can shower and do my devotions and prepare for the day before everyone else is up.
Dandi D says
I shared on Twitter: https://twitter.com/dandidaffyhill/status/494318000447565824
Cori Westphal says
I’m a list maker. I makes lists for everything. And I put everything in my calender in my phone so I get alerts when I have to do something. Works for me!
coriwestphal at msn dot com
Cori Westphal says
Tweet: https://twitter.com/coriwestphal/status/494504317378764801
coriwestphal at msn dot com
Sarah L says
I swim 3 times a week and love doing it. It keeps me sane.
Thanks for the contest.
Sarah L says
https://twitter.com/slehan/status/494969064633008128
Tabathia B says
I try to keep my to do list and appointments on my calendar and space things out so I am not overwhelmed
tbarrettno1 at gmail dot com
Tabathia B says
tweet https://twitter.com/ChelleB36/status/494970813418713088
tbarrettno1 at gmail dot com
maria cantu says
I make lists for everything.